Melted cheese? No – Melt Down!!

04 Apr



I didn’t need my doctor to give me the bad news.  I knew I was officially having a melt down!  I had no control over it, I didn’t want this to happen to me, I wanted life to stay the same….but the cheese had moved.

I certainly felt like my work-life balance had disintegrated before my eyes and I didn’t care if I never went back to work again.  But there was so much that I was responsible for in my professional life.  Talk about a stressful situation.

I decided to put all work stuff out of my mind during the weeks ahead.  I concentrated on some hobbies at home, made the most of Christmas and mentally prepared myself for the next step to come that would help resolve the work trauma.  I got my house in order before I tackled my career.

The boss wanted me to attend formal mediation sessions with the other people who were involved.  Yay – finally a road that would hopefully lead to recovery and one that would definitely pave the way for me to get my feelings out there in a rational way.  Well I hope all would be rational!

I figured that I needed to do some real preparation for the mediation sessions.  I wanted to be on top of my game.  I wanted a positive outcome.  But I couldn’t get rid of the negative feelings.  These were people I had strong relationships with and whom I had known for more than 10 years.   But it was time to not take things personally – this was business.

I went to my first mediation session to give my view of the events that led to my melt down.  I hadn’t been involved in anything this intense before.  However I had a really bad vibe from the woman who was the mediator and immediately felt that I wasn’t going to get anything out of this process.

Then my brain suddenly clicked into gear………what was I thinking – I had to keep my job, I had to repair these working relationships and I had to feel better about myself.

So was I going to get caught in the mousetrap or would I be able to find the new cheese in my life?

Time would tell.


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Posted by on April 4, 2011 in Diary Entries


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